When You Were Mine Read online

  “I had some oatmeal today,” Valerie offered.

  “Oh, please.” Isabel huffed. “You had like two tiny spoonfulls.”

  “Oh my God, Valerie,” Sarah said, already dialing someone. “You can’t do this.”

  “Do what?” Valerie asked, anxiously sitting up. “And who are you calling?”

  Sarah held up her hand and proceeded to order two large pepperoni pizzas with extra cheese and sausage, something that normally would have Valerie’s mouth watering. Now it only made her frown. She had no desire to stuff her face.

  “You’re going to eat at least half like you normally would,” Sarah said as soon as she hung up.

  “I don’t eat half a large pizza all by myself,” Valerie said, wiping her nose with a tissue.

  Both Sarah and Isabel crossed their arms and raised an eyebrow. Sarah took a seat next to her on her bed, putting a hand over Valerie’s. “I’m so sorry, honey. I wish there was something I could say that would magically make the pain go away.”

  Valerie shook her head. “It’s my own fault—”

  “No, it’s not,” Sarah said firmly. “We all thought he’d changed. Even Angel had noticed something had changed these last couple of months.” She shook her head. “I’m so mad at Alex right now. I can’t believe he’d be such a jerk.”

  “I don’t wanna talk about him, Sarah,” Valerie said, feeling the unyielding lump in her throat again. “The only hope I have of getting over him once and for all is to stay away from him for good and not think or talk about him at all. I can do that if I throw myself into my work.”

  The concern on Sarah’s face changed for a second. She looked a little alarmed. Maybe she didn’t buy that Valerie could actually do it. So Valerie continued to explain why she thought she could.

  “My job excites me. I get so into it. After this week”—she held her chin up—“because I’m not taking a day off after this week, not to cry over him anyway, I’ll use work as my therapy. I think if I could do that for even a few months I’ll be home free. I just need him out of my life completely for a few months.”

  Sarah let out a breath then smiled. “Oh good. I thought maybe this little speech was leading up to you pulling out of being my maid of honor because you don’t want to be around him, but that’s almost a year away.” She smiled big. “By then, who knows? You might even have a boyfriend, be engaged, or even married to someone else yourself.”

  Or maybe he would, and Valerie would be forced to be around his new girl. Her only consolation was that the man was clearly incapable of committing and it was nearly a year away. Anything could happen by then. As Sarah said, it wasn’t implausible that Valerie might be happily married even—the very thought nearly had her rolling her eyes.

  Sarah and Isabel succeeded in getting Valerie to eat, though she didn’t eat half the pizza as she was normally able to do. Still, she’d had two slices.

  Now Valerie stood in her kitchen, staring at her latest text from Alex. She’d been ready to delete it without reading it as she had all the rest, but she caught the preview of it and panicked, so she clicked on it.

  I’m coming to see you since you won’t answer any of my calls or respond to my texts. If you’ve read any of my texts, you know the craziness I’ve been dealing with. If you haven’t, then I’ll tell you about it when I come over. But we are going to talk, Valerie. I WILL NOT let things end this way.

  Valerie rolled her eyes. She was so sick of hearing his excuses for being too busy for her. Angel was just as busy, and he managed to be around Sarah all the time. Obviously, he’d found time to spend with the slutty so-called tutor in her fuck-me shorts. Alex would never change, and she resented that he thought he could call the shots about how, when, and where she was supposed to just agree to listen to all his garbage excuses.

  Whatever it was he’d been so crazy busy with, she’d never know because she’d never ask. She’d already made Sarah promise there’d be no talk of him ever. Valerie didn’t know anything about his life anymore. She was officially divorcing herself from his life. Another thing she’d made Sarah promise was to not tell Alex how broken up she was about this. Valerie had been pathetic in his eyes long enough.

  Sarah said he’d never ask her. He was too proud. If it hadn’t been for Isabel, she wouldn’t have even known about what happened between them. Sarah told Valerie that when she’d asked Alex if he’d heard or talked to Valerie lately, he’d barely acknowledged her question with a shrug and left the room quickly. Still, Valerie made her promise that if he ever did ask she’d tell him professionally Valerie was on cloud nine and socially she seemed content. Sarah didn’t have to give him details, just make it sound as though she’d moved on and couldn’t be happier.

  So far, Valerie had promised everyone that worried about her, but most importantly she promised her battered heart, that this time he wouldn’t weasel his way back in her life. Seeing him could be disastrous. Of that she was certain. But taking one last call from him she could manage. If she did, it would be for one reason only: to make sure she made herself crystal clear that this was the end of the road for her. She needed out of this relationship before she needed to seek real therapy. She’d been depressed about Alex in the past, but this by far had been the absolute worst. As impossibly in love as she was with him, she needed him out of her life.

  Just thinking about it had her choking up, and she knew when she actually did it—cut him off for good—she’d be a mess afterward. But as her dad had said, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” She’d for sure be stronger for having fallen so addictively hard for Alex Moreno and then actually being able to just walk away.

  She laughed suddenly—bitterly—reigniting the thought that she may, in fact, already be in need of some real therapy. She smiled, remembering what else her dad had said about what didn’t kill her just before he left the other day.

  “Another thing about what doesn’t kill you,” he said as he stopped at the door and looked back at her. “It sure as fuck better outrun me.”

  Even then when the pain of her meltdown was even rawer than it was now, Valerie had laughed. Talking to Alex again wouldn’t be easy. She knew exactly what she’d say and exactly what he’d be thinking. She didn’t have to tell him Elijah had since relocated to another county. That would ease his mind and why would she do that? Besides, if he did automatically jump to the conclusion that she was seeing someone from her office, he wouldn’t be too far off. There was new manager in her office, one equally as successful and good-looking as Elijah. She could now use him as her new mental consolation because she’d already caught the dapper new manager eyeing her in that same way Elijah had that made Alex’s jaw go taut.

  With a deep breath, she gathered her strength. She could do this. She had to. There was no other option anymore.

  Chapter 11

  Alex

  Without exaggeration, Alex could say this was the worst week of his life. It didn’t appear to be getting any better any time soon either. The construction on the restaurant had just gotten started, and already they were having issues, issues his dad had given him the go-ahead to make decisions on. Big expensive decisions. Most of the designs for the new floor had yet to be discussed. His dad hadn’t picked out flooring, tiles, colors, or window dressings.

  Nothing.

  It was all in Alex’s hands, and he and Joe, the guy managing the huge job, were now on each other’s speed dials.

  Alex had been on the phone with Joe longer than all the calls and texts he’d made to Valerie put together. On top of that, Alex was now on crutches again. He had torn a ligament in his ankle. The doctor had warned him he needed to stay off his foot, but staying off it meant staying in bed, and with his schedule being what it was, that was impossible. So the pain had only gotten worse all week instead of getting any better.

  Between his doctor’s appointments, the restaurant, and school, the week had just flown by. But he was determined to make time to talk to Valerie. He figured, as upset a
s she’d been, it’d be better if he gave her time to cool off anyway. It hadn’t stopped him from thinking of her. Every time he did, he would send her another text or try calling her. Of course, each time had been to no avail.

  His mind was made up though. He wasn’t giving up on Valerie this easily. He’d already warned her that if she didn’t answer his calls or respond to his texts he’d be headed to her place. If he had to, he’d camp out on her front porch until she gave him a chance to explain. He’d fucked up, but his heart wouldn’t accept that it was over. It couldn’t be.

  It was a struggle, but he managed to wobble his way out of the restaurant back office and out the back door again. It’d be so much easier if he just called Valerie in the comfort of the office. But he didn’t want to risk the miniscule chance he had of Valerie answering his call. He had some serious begging to do, and he wasn’t about to do it in front of any of his employees or even Sofie or Angel. And he especially didn’t want Sarah hearing. She’d already given him the cold shoulder all week. He knew what she was thinking. While he might be willing to explain to Valerie about his sneaking around with the tutor, he didn’t need the whole world in on his business.

  Because of Angel, he already knew Sarah knew about the tutor being at his place. He also knew that, like Valerie, Sarah thought he was full of shit. They all did. Angel had even laughed at his cockamamie excuse. “You couldn’t think of anything better, dude?”

  Alex hadn’t bothered explaining, so he knew Sarah was thinking the worst. As sweet as his brother’s little girlfriend could be, she had one mean stink eye. He’d seen it more than once that week.

  Finally comfortable leaning against his truck, he tried Valerie again and waited to hear that sweet voice on her voice mail. Her answering was such a surprise he nearly fell over when he tried to straighten up abruptly. He cursed inwardly when one of his crutches fell and his foot hit the ground for an instant, sending the shocking pain up his ankle. He managed to hold himself up with the other crutch.

  “Valerie, babe—”

  “The only reason I’m even answering your call, Alex, is because I don’t want you coming over to my place. I don’t want to see you ever—”

  “Valerie, please,” he said, gripping the phone. “Please, let me explain, baby. That’s all I’m asking.”

  “I’ve moved on, Alex. You should too.”

  That stunned him silent for a moment. She had to be kidding. It’d only been a week—okay a week and four days since they’d last been together—but she couldn’t be serious.

  “Moved on? What do you mean? It’s only been—”

  “It’s why I’m answering, Alex. I have a new career now. It’s a different world. I’m meeting new people every day now. Men.” The emphasized word punched him violently in the gut. “Grown-up men who aren’t into games like—”

  “Wait, wait,” he said, his insides already warming but fully aware that she thought he’d had a girl at his house just a week ago. He knew she thought he’d been spending all those days he’d been away from her with Gwyneth, and while that was partially true, it wasn’t how she and everyone else were thinking. Damn it. She was just mad and trying to sock it to him. He shook away the image of the smug asshole at the sushi bar who looked at Valerie in a way that normally would’ve had Alex in his face. Instead, he took a deep breath. “I know you’re not saying that you—”

  “I am,” she said with a conviction he’d only ever heard from her when she was absolutely serious.

  The fear that had been mounting all week spiked. The fear that maybe he really fucked things up so badly this time and she was really walking away, suffocated him. Then she continued to pummel away at his heart.

  “I shouldn’t have to explain anything to you.” She stopped to clear her throat then took a moment before she spoke again. “But I know you, so I’m just warning you. I don’t wanna have to call the cops if you think you can just storm back into my life the way you always have.”

  “You know I will,” he said, squeezing his eyes shut but not nearly with as much conviction as she’d made her statements.

  “No, you won’t,” she said, and for an instant, he thought he heard a weakness in her voice, but she cleared her throat and went on. “I’m telling you now so that there’s no doubt. I’ve moved on. If you show up here, there’s a very good chance that I’ll be entertaining someone else. So save yourself the trip because you’ll be the only one asked to leave. I’ll call the cops if I have to, Alex. It’s over. Accept it. I have.”

  Accept it?

  Accept it?

  Was she being serious? He’d been so staggered it took him a second to catch his breath, but before he could respond, the line clicked and she was gone. He immediately dialed her back, but it went straight to voice mail. He tried again and he got the same thing.

  Figuring she must’ve turned her phone off, he knew she wouldn’t see a text from him either, but he had to respond to that last comment even if she didn’t see it until later. So he typed his text out furiously.

  You can’t be serious, Z. You have to let me explain.

  He would’ve said more, but Joe stuck his head out the back door. “There you are,” he said, looking incredibly relieved. “We have a problem.”

  Alex frowned and hit send. “Grab that crutch for me, will you?”

  Joe did and began telling him about their latest construction headache. Joe had already warned him. He would do his best to keep things running as smoothly as possible without having to bother Alex, but with a job this big, he could expect for things to go wrong left and right.

  He’d gotten so caught up with the issue that Joe had played way down when he first explained it that it was days before he could put some real thought into his Valerie disaster. His heart hadn’t stopped hurting since the day he’d last spoken to her, and he’d barely gotten any sleep.

  There’s a good chance I’ll be entertaining someone. It’s over. Accept it. I have.

  The brutal words played out over and over in his head, especially when he was lying in bed at night. He’d been close to just driving to her place more than once and to hell with her warnings. He’d beat the shit out of anyone she might be entertaining then drop to his knees and beg her to hear him out. But it was too risky. He knew her too well. She would’ve never answered his call if she wasn’t serious about her threat of calling the cops on him. The last thing he needed right now was to be thrown in jail. And if he was, he wouldn’t be getting out soon because if, in fact, she did have a guy—that smug asshole Eli—at her place when he showed up, Alex was going away for a long time. If he felt what he had when he thought Isabel’s brother was someone she was entertaining, there’d be no holding him back. Not even Valerie jumping into his arms as she’d done then would stop him because this time she’d made it clear that any guy at her place now would not be just a friend.

  If his damn ankle didn’t get any better soon, he could be looking at losing his scholarship. All the sneaking around he’d done and risked losing Valerie for, would be all for nothing if he couldn’t play anymore. Overseeing everything at the restaurants so his parents wouldn’t have to worry would be the only thing he’d have left to make up for all his other failures.

  Alex dropped his face into his hands, leaning both elbows on his desk for a moment and took a deep breath. There was so much floating around in his head. He could barely keep it all straight, and he was actually tempted for a moment to drop his biggest anguish of all. Forget about Valerie. He didn’t deserve her anyway. He’d let his fucking pride come before her feelings. If anyone else hurt her the way he had, Alex would be ready to kill him. He should just respect her wishes and let her be. His life would continue to be this storm of one thing after another for a while anyway. He’d likely fuck things up again. Hurt her again. He should just walk away.

  But he couldn’t.

  The phone rang, yanking him out of his tortured thoughts for the moment. As if he didn’t have enough to deal with, the name on the
caller ID made him wince. Dr. Gupta was another one he had on a speed dial and spoke to more often than he’d like to lately.

  Yesterday he’d gone in for another MRI since the pain in his ankle was only getting worse. She’d given him a tongue lashing for not staying off it as she’d told him to, but he explained he just couldn’t.

  “Mr. Moreno,” she said when he answered. “How is your ankle feeling today?”

  “Not so good,” he said, still leaning his forehead against his free fist.

  “I’m not surprised,” she said. “I don’t suppose you finally took my advice and stayed off it?”

  “Sort of,” he said, wanting to avoid any more lectures.

  “Sort of?” She tsk-tsked then began speaking as quickly as she normally did. “Well, normally I’d wait to get you back in here to discuss your results, but I know how busy you said you are, so I thought I’d save you the extra trip and just call you. You’re going to need surgery again. And soon. The tendon is now torn, and it looks as if you’ve pulled another. I can’t risk your stubborn behind continuing to walk on it. I want to schedule your surgery ASAP.”

  Alex placed the phone on speaker and put it down on the desk, dropping his face back into the palms of his hands. Dr. Gupta continued with all the details of what exactly was wrong and how long it was going to take to recover enough, if ever, to play football again. She’d never been one to sugarcoat things, and Alex could hear it in her voice now. She didn’t anticipate his playing days to go on much longer. He was so screwed.

  Angel and Sarah walked in just at the tail end of Dr. Gupta’s spiel. Angel stared at him wide-eyed. “You’re gonna need surgery again?”

  Alex nodded with a frown, but seeing Sarah brought back thoughts of Valerie again. He’d debated about asking Sarah for help in trying to get Valerie to listen to him, but she’d hardly made herself approachable since the whole thing had gone down. Sarah had been noticeably miffed at him in the past because of his and Valerie’s ongoing antics, but this was by far the coldest she’d been with him. All the more reason to think maybe this was really it for him and Val. No telling what Valerie had been saying to her, a thought that rendered him almost breathless again like when Valerie had dropped those cruel words on him.